Article by Kevin L. DeWitt

It’s pretty rare that I have fun.  I don’t know why … it has just always seemed to be this way.  Many times I wonder, is it so hard to be Kevin and to know what I like, what I find to be fun?

It seems to be a constant challenge to be myself.

Over the years, other people have told me that they also find it difficult to figure out exactly what they like to do … for both fun and for work.

And I’ve identified one reason – out of perhaps many - for that.

In Stumbling on Happiness, Daniel Gilbert points out that we’re all more alike than we think.  I’m sure that is true to a degree… but I think it’s also true that we’re more unalike than we think.  This is certainly true when it comes to fun, be it leisure or work “fun.”

Many people assume that they find something fun because that activity is inherently fun.  But nothing is “inherently” fun.  Every one of us is different, with varying likes and dislikes.  For example:

My roommate at the University of Kentucky majored in political science, then got a Ph.D. in anthropology. I asked him, “Why didn’t you take any anthropology courses as an undergrad?” He said, “At the time, I thought that was the type of thing everyone found interesting. It didn’t occur to me to study it until much later.”

A friend explained what he did for work when he first moved to Louisville.  He said, “I could only work part-time, so of course I tried to get a job with the city parks department.” Why “of course“?  It would never occur to me to try to work for the parks department.

Another friend told me, “If I didn’t have the job I have, I’d love to be a travel agent. But of course, that’s just so fun.” To me, being a travel agent would seem like work, not fun.

It can be easy to overlook our likes and dislikes, or take them for granted, because we assume everyone likes this or that.  Homophily describes our tendency to spend time with people who are similar to us, which reinforces the notion that our likes and dislikes are widely held.

 … everyone likes video games, everyone likes reading, everyone loves music … everyone likes computers … everyone dislikes mowing the lawn or painting a room in their house.

Well, it’s not true of course.

So, if you’re trying to figure out what to do as a job or as a hobby, try asking yourself, “What do I actually do, when I have some free time”?  Not what you THINK you should be doing, but what you actually enjoy.

Be honest.  It is much harder for most people than you think.  It’s hard for me as I think about my job search and what I really want to do for the last twenty years of my career … and wanting that time to be rewarding.

How about you?  Have what do you find fun?

“He who does not get fun and enjoyment out of every day … needs to reorganize his life.”
-George M. Adams

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