Staying Sane in Today’s Job Market
And learning we are not what we do for a living …
You are what you do. That’s the unfortunate lie that our culture has ingrained into most of us since we were children bringing our parents into school for career day.
However, if you are one of the millions who find themselves without work in this economy, you’ll find that the job search and the imposed idleness chips away at your self-esteem. As a job search stretches into months, you begin to wonder what happened to your energy, your sense of humor and perhaps even your sanity.
And in the midst of it all, you are bombarded by – guess what – thousands of articles and tips that make coping with unemployment and a job search sound simple, easy. Bombarded to the point that you begin to resent the tips and assume there is an ulterior motive for every article … if you will only send in $19.99 for the “real” solution!
Yet solutions for dealing with unemployment are not one-size-fits-all. And they are not (or shouldn’t be) a get rich scheme for someone else. And they are definitely easier said than done. So with that said, here are my tips – not for getting the perfect job – but for getting through the day.
Grieve, but don’t throw yourself off the roof.
We are all human. You are entitled to a few days of watching DVDs in your pajamas when your employer downsizes you. A few days of self-pity. Notice the operative phrase here is “a few days,’ not a week and certainly not longer. If you have pets, they will enjoy wallowing with you. If you have a spouse and children, they may be alarmed, but insist they give you a little grieving period.
Get up, say clean, dress.
After no more than a few days, make sure you force yourself off the couch and into the shower. Get out of bed at the same time every day (in the early to mid-morning!) and get dressed in street clothes … not sweats and not fresh pajamas. You will feel better.
Routine is important.
Doesn’t matter what your ritual is. What is important is to have a morning ritual that you can maintain. You might choose to go for a walk with your dog every morning before breakfast. You might choose to build a routine around a morning coffee and news reading after your walk. You might choose to start every day going outside to watch the sunrise and thank God for the new day. Our lives are busy enough. You won’t be able to amble around the neighborhood when you’re working again, so try to appreciate the interlude.
Job searches.
Check your Internet job sites at the same time every day, perhaps after your morning coffee and news. Once you have registered for each job-search site and have reviewed possible positions going back about 30 days … you need only check the newly listed positions each day.
Hint – Don’t rely on automated job searched offered by the jobs boards. There are not that many new jobs posted each day … and with an automated search yo might miss a job you would really love.
Call it staying in touch. “Networking” sounds and feels like using people, and for me is so off-putting that I hesitate to even try. Call or email former colleagues and vendors to chat and to keep up with what’s going on in your field. If a job lead comes out of it, great, but the real benefit is preventing isolation. And contact people with appropriate frequency; don’t stalk.
Exercise.
Some people dread exercise more than professional association mixers. For me, it’s a tie … but only because I let myself get too out of shape and find myself trying to reverse the tide.
I know you have read this in every one of a thousand articles … but exercise is like the shower with ten times more power. It offers emotional benefits as well as physical benefits. You don’t need to train for a marathon, just exercise more than you are now. Take walks. Use an medicine ball. Be satisfied with incremental improvements.
Don’t drink excessively.
Drinking can make you forget your financial and self-worth problems for an evening. But alcohol is a depressant. Over drinking will only make things worse for your self-esteem, your wallet, and your health.
And you certainly can’t create a positive daily routine nursing a hang-over.
Volunteer.
We all know the rewards of volunteering … or we should. This is the perfect opportunity to try something you have always been interested in and never had time. Do something that makes you feel good. At its most base level, volunteer work gets you out of the house. It can also increase your marketable skills … and is also a form of “networking” (I know, that word again!). But the bottom line is … it is good to help others, and it feels good!
Take up a class or hobby.
Line volunteering, taking a class or starting a hobby gives you somewhere to go. You can take a class to increase job skills, but consider taking a subject for its own sake, like photography or guitar. Pick up a hobby you’ve been neglecting or find a new hobby. If it’s too expensive, find a simpler one, like a book club or gardening.
What is the common thread in all these suggestions? Being grateful for what you have. Finding stability. Starting new habits. And learning that you are not what you do for a living.
“We can never really be prepared for that which is wholly new. We have to adjust ourselves, and every radical adjustment is a crisis in self-esteem: we undergo a test, we have to prove ourselves. It needs inordinate self-confidence to face drastic change without inner trembling.”
-Eric Hoffer
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