Article by Make The Days Count Contributor Judy Mosley

 

You would think it would be easy.

 

Standing up for truth.  Making the right choice.  Taking full responsibility for what has been given to us.  It should be easy, right?  And yet when we’ve done the right thing, we might end up disappointed because the effects of those choices aren’t at all what we had expected.

 

We lose weight and then come face to face with the issues that have been plaguing us our entire lives.  We quit smoking and have to deal with the discomfort of breaking the addictions that our bodies had formed with the cigarettes.  We speak the truth in a toxic relationship, hoping for healing, yet having the relationship end while we are left feeling a loneliness we hadn’t anticipated.

 

Growing up, I had believed that if I really did the right thing I would be enveloped with some mystical feeling of love or joy - triumphant music playing in the background - which would keep me from feeling anything negative.

 

It doesn’t happen.  It’s just not that easy.  And I don’t want anyone to lose heart, but to be prepared for the road ahead.  We should stand up, take control, and do what’s best for our lives, but we also need to be realistic and aware of what we are about to face.

 

There are steps that all of us can take to keep us on the right path for our lives.  This is what I have learned on my personal journey and I hope these steps will keep you strong as you do what’s best for your own life.

 

1. Keep the truth in front of you.

Literally.  Write it down, where you can see it every morning.  We need to keep focused on what the truth is so that we won’t settle for less, or worse, go back to our old way of living, simply because we feel uncomfortable in our present circumstances.

 

2. Talk to someone who’s been there.

I called up one of my friends the other day to “vent” about how I’ve been feeling since I have made my own difficult decisions this year.  She listened and then said those precious words that I needed to hear, “I know exactly how you feel.”  She went on to describe how she had been through some similar circumstances and how she had felt during that time.  Then she reminded me that things will get better, but maybe not in the way, or the time that I want it to.

 

A good friend who’s been there is invaluable in times like these.  Find someone who can lift you up and remind yourself that you aren’t alone.

 

3. Make peace with the moment.

This is easier said than done.  Sometimes, we need to be realistic and understand that our current circumstances are part of the effects of the choices we made.  It doesn’t mean that we did something wrong or that there is something wrong with us.  And keep in mind that it won’t be this way forever.  It’s just the way things are for right now.

 

4. Move into gratitude.

 This is a deliberate act of the mind.  It is the choice that you have to make whether you feel gratitude or not.  Being grateful opens up our eyes to what’s around us and it brings us joy in ways that we might not have expected.  Start a gratitude journal and begin to write down things that you are grateful for.  You might find your mood change quicker than you had expected.

 

5. Watch for the bend in the road.

Stay awake.  Life always changes.  We must remain aware of this wonderful characteristic of life so that we will be able to see the good things that are coming toward us.

 

Have you ever driven through a terrible storm, only to find yourself on the other end of it, the sun shining, and the earth sparkling with the wetness of the rain?  What if you had kept your eyes only on the storm behind you, instead of the beauty that was in front of you?  By staying focused on our sorrows, we shut out the gifts that life wants to give to us.  Keep your eyes ahead and keep your heart hoping.

 

Things will get better.

 

You might be feeling uncomfortable or you may be feeling pain that you didn’t think was possible to bear.  But, when we do what’s best for our lives, when we make the most of our time here on earth, good things will naturally spring from that.  Relax and trust that your hope will be rewarded.

 

In the meantime, don’t forget to do things that bring you joy.  Read a good book.  Spend time with friends.  Listen to some great music.  Dance.  Watch a thought provoking movie.  There is always joy to be taken hold of, no matter what circumstance you find yourself in.  Don’t lose out on the joy now.

 

Even a good storm is amazing to watch.  It’s all in how you look at it.

 

“… every time you make a choice you are turning the central part of you, the part of you that chooses, into something a little different from what it was before.  And taking your life as a whole, with all your innumerable choices, all your life long you are slowly turning this central thing either into a creature that is in harmony with God, and with other creatures, and with itself, or else into one that is in a state of war and hatred with God, and with its fellow creatures, and with itself.  To be the one kind of creature is heaven: that is, it is joy and peace and knowledge and power.  To be the other means madness, horror, idiocy, rage, impotence, and eternal loneliness.  Each of us at each moment is progressing to the one state or the other.”
-C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity

 

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