Part 3 of a 3 Part Series

Article by Make the Days Count Contributor Judy Mosley

 

“If everything is sacred, then nothing is sacred.”

-Peter Walsh

 

What’s sacred in your life?  What are the material possessions that hold real value for your family?  Is it a family heirloom, an important award, or old love letters from your spouse?  Could you find them immediately, if someone asked to see them?  Do they have a place of honor in your home?  Or are they buried beneath everything else that you can’t get rid of?

 

My husband and I found ourselves in this situation at the beginning of our marriage.  We spent the first two years of our marriage shopping instead of connecting with each other and material things took the place of passion.  We lived paycheck to paycheck and couldn’t understand why.  This left us feeling frustrated, broke, and surrounded by things that we didn’t even like.  We came to the conclusion that we couldn’t live this way any longer. 

 

These are some of the steps that we took to change our lives and the guidelines that we created for ourselves to live by each day.

 

1. Master the Room of Doom.

Let me be clear that this room wasn’t a specific room in our home but all the stuff that was shoved into whatever room was chosen as the holding place.  We had to relocate this “room” often, especially when change demanded it.  It took six years to vanquish the room and we have to fight every day so that another one isn’t created.

 

For some, the “room of doom” isn’t a room but the dining room table or some other place in the home where all of the household clutter seems to gather.

 

For your own room of doom, I suggest going through a box a week.  Make quick decisions regarding its contents as to whether you keep, donate, sell, or throw it away.

 

2. Hold a yard sale every year until all that’s left is what you love.

I remember during the first couple of years of marriage, people would ask if we were moving because we put so much stuff in our front yard!  For three years straight, we held enormous yard sales and we were surprised by what would and would not sell.  The things that we thought were collectors’ items, were impossible to get rid of.  But the key for us was that at the end of the day, whatever wasn’t sold was taken to Goodwill.

 

If you are willing to drag it out in the yard to sell it, don’t drag it back in.  Let it go so that someone else can use it.

 

3. Make a Master To-Do list.

We actually do this quite often.  We will make a list of things that need to be done around the house and we set the goal of scratching off at least one item a month.  This is reasonable time for us since we have two children that we choose to give high priority.  We also know that it’s not emotionally healthy for them to live in a half-finished home.  We want to quiet the silent noises for them as well.

 

Start your own list and set goals that are reachable for your life.  Try to get small ones accomplished first.  Once you see what you can do, it will encourage you to complete more.

 

4. Use What We Have

As we rummaged through our belongings, we discovered many things that we wanted to keep around as well as things that we could use for future projects.  There have been many times where we didn’t have to buy something because we found out we already had what we needed.

 

When you do this, remember to put the things that can be used later in a place where you can find them again.  This can save you a lot of money and time instead of going out and buying what you didn’t need anyway.

 

5. Buy it only if you love it.

This is something that guides everything that we buy, from eating out to grocery shopping and from gifts to clothes.  If we don’t love it, we don’t buy it.  Period.  We strive not to settle for something just because it’s on sale or because it might not be there tomorrow.  Life is so crazy and we have to guard our money for the times when we will really need it.

 

We all could spend our money on lots of “things” that end up cluttering our home and our life, but there are only a few things that we really need.  In addition to tie and how we spend it (with our family, helping others, taking care of ourselves, etc.) … it is important to invest less in “things” and more in savings for inevitable emergencies that will come in our lives, our children’s education, etc.  Having a lot of things won’t help us take care of ourselves and our families in a crisis.

 

The point is freedom!

 

If we are going to make our days count, we would be well-served to let go of the mind-sets, habits, and material things that keep us from doing that.  Imagine living in such a way that where you could make decisions freely, based on what was really important. We are free when we can live in such a way that we care of ourselves, nurture our relationships, and make the impact that we want without anything holding us back.

 

“It’s easy to lose focus, to forget your priorities and wander from the path. There is not any one thing you can do to survive this desert. It’s a matter of maintenance, of the small things you do every day and every week to keep the engine running smoothly.”
-Ralph Winter, Behind the Screen

 

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